It seems like just yesterday that we were sitting inside the gymnasium with family and friends waiting for the command to load the buses. Waiting for the command to send us to Iraq. Sitting cross legged on the floor with General So-And-So speaking down to us from the center of the floor, his stance as orator confirmed both by his rank and his disposition. After providing us, the audience, with 3 of his 4 advisory points to a good deployment he was ready to lay the last on. But first, a recap. His points, in order, were to trust your training, trust your leaders, and to trust your battle buddies. All great ideas, magnificent concepts. Every single one twisted and maimed by untrustworthy leaders, unplanned and convoluted training, and incompetent battle buddies. After such a fine line up of tips it only made sense that his fourth and final suggestion was that we, the deploying force, “forget our families”. Although nearly 8 months have passed since I heard that insane comment, I still remember seeing (and hearing) the questioning glances and stares, the side comments and laughs.
General So-And-So thankfully elaborated. Don’t you worry a bit about the family member’s you’re leaving behind here he said. They’re in good hands, and you can trust each and every one of your fellow soldiers who are staying behind to look out for you, and for them.
“…” I thought. Aren’t the people we’re leaving behind traditionally those who had issues, either physical, mental, or other which precluded them from being able to deploy? I mean, no disrespect to the hordes of women in the Army who really wanted to procreate, but the legion of knocked-up women who ran our administrative details didn’t inspire the most confidence, especially when you started noticing a trail of shitty paperwork based on how much “pregnant rage” they seemed to be oozing at the moment. Then again, I could always place my faith in the mentally unstable that would be standing by on the home front, waiting for me to need something they could feebly comprehend. I can still picture their mission capable status – an urgent request for some fast food has come down from Iraq! Quick! To the drive through!
Thankfully most of us were sound enough to handle our own families. Though thankfully General So-And-So told us to forget them, so that we could focus on the fight ahead. Deployments are rough, he said, and we will need to spend all of our available focus and attention on finishing what we started in Iraq. What that was he never mentioned, but I was certain it was a war. These days though, I’m mostly confused as to what we do in this country. Don’t get me wrong, we go out and walk around, with guns even, but there is lacking a certain purpose. Today for instance, I woke up and went to the gym. Later I scored some bread, and watched a movie. I even had three energy drinks. Right now I feel that I’m typing in some sort of European dance club as techno blares impossibly loud and my roommate looks up the Dutch Rudder on Urban Dictionary dot com. It’s a hard life this war is.
But the finishing comments of General So-And-So didn’t quite make sense to me until I was 5 months into this deployment, and it has taken me this long to finish the Generality series because I didn’t understand the importance of forgetting your family until then. It came to light when my chain of command decided that my request for leave (a vacation, everyone deploying for a year gets a 2 week span in the midst of their year) was switched from the end of May to August without reason. Well, there was reason, but it wasn’t in any sense valid. Someone had re-enlisted in the Army, so they were able to choose their dates, thereby forcing the already agreed upon leave schedule of Team 3 into a spiraling chaos which re-aligned almost all of the dates. I won’t mention any names, but it was Traitor. Just another of her better qualities: fucking over everyone else for her own benefit.
So I called up my 1SG and requested that my dates be switched back to May, so that I could attend my sister’s wedding. At least 10 requests were sent up, and it wasn’t until I let it be known that my family was interested in contacting my chain of command on my behalf that I saw any results. “Fine” my 1SG muttered, she would change my dates to May. I was ecstatic.
As the time approached in April for me to be given my final dates of leave I became nervous. I still hadn’t told my sister that I should be able to attend her wedding, because I was concerned that in the last few hours the Army would hold it over my head. And I was right. A questionnaire came down about who would stay in the Army and would didn’t give a damn anymore. I gleefully nominated myself in the not giving a damn category, and the day later an e-mail came tumbling back. In the entire philosophy of “forget your family” I was given an arrival date in the U.S. which was after the wedding. The wedding date had been known to me for a few months, so I made sure everyone of importance knew it as well. But because I said I didn’t want to stay in the Army, my love of family was pushed aside.
I’m certain my response was of the 4 lettered variety. Long and numerous my comments to everyone who would listen were, and with great regret I called my sister and informer her that I would be unable to attend the event.
Again, it took an almost magical event for the date to get changed. Goblin King set up a flight for me 8 days prior to my alleged departure day, Blue acted as a sounding board for my anger and rage, and even Skitzo got involved by chewing out our commander while Goblin King took on the 1SG. All of this, because I said I wasn’t going to re-enlist. My father even used position as a father, and a fellow soldier, so try and sway those in charge. It came down to the near wire, but it changed with everyone of importance claiming ignorance as to why the dates hadn’t worked out at first. I ended up making the wedding and having a wonderful time spent with family and friends. But I know the truth as to why I almost didn’t – I hadn’t forgotten my family properly.
In his second speech, General So-And-So rephrased his 4th point to sound less glum, but the point had been made. All of them actually. We were a group of soldiers deploying to Iraq with inadequate training, childish leadership, imbecilic battle buddies, and a focus on nothing that would help us maintain sanity and trust with our families. It is fortunate that we are not in any semblance of a war here, or we would all truly be tried and found wanting of our inabilities. So thank you for the advice, sir, but it’s all bullshit too.
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